Wednesday, March 26, 2014

Take My Card, Please - 3/26/2014

As far as I can tell, according to pop culture, I am not a man. Let me list the reasons.

  1. I have asked for directions
  2. I have read the instructions before trying to put it together
  3. I can do laundry
  4. I am not obsessed with sports
  5. I am capable of listening to a human female
  6. I have cried in public
  7. I can admit when I am wrong
  8. I am fully aware that women can do pretty much any damn thing they please
  9. I am also not threatened by this fact
  10. I can accept losing at something
  11. When someone points out to me a flaw in my plans, I am more likely to reconsider my plans than enter into a state of denial
  12. I know who Jane Austen, Jane Eyre and Jane Curtin are
  13. Of the three, I really only like Jane Curtin, though
  14. I have no idea who played second base for the '37 Mets
  15. I had to look them up in Wikipedia to figure out that the Mets didn't exist until 1962
  16. I loathe the Three Stooges
  17. Also Will Ferrell
  18. I would honestly rather have a deep discussion about life, science, art or emotions than hunt, fish, work on a car, write my name in the snow or learn how to spit for distance
  19. The only time I have ever asked a woman to make me a sandwich, she was working in a restaurant
  20. While I understand that the human reproductive cycle can cause emotional instability in some women at times, I do not automatically dismiss anything that a woman says with which I happen to disagree as “hormones”


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